- I really, really hate it when Phil goes away and it makes me feel super co-dependent and also like a really bad feminist which makes me sad.
- Sometimes when Phil goes away I don't do the washing up for two days and consider eating crisps and dip for dinner.
- Sometimes I really, really don't want to go for a run.
- Sometimes it even makes me question why I'm training for a marathon in the first place.
- I have a really bad time relaxing because I have this horrible idea of my life slipping away while I'm incessantly checking Facebook or watching TV.
- I hate vacuuming and if Phil isn't here I definitely don't do it
- I worry that people think I'm boring because I like early nights and not going out.
- I worry that I try too hard.
- I worry that while I'm trying to do the right thing and do things like give blood and train for a marathon and go to the library every day that people think I'm holier-than-thou. I do these things because they make me happy, not to show off. I actually really wish I could be more relaxed and could stop putting pressure on myself to do certain things and be a certain way.
- I don't always like how Type A I am.
- I worry that I don't clean my flat as much as I should. I worry that there's some cleaning somewhere that I've forgotten to do and one day I'm going to find a huge pile of mould/ants/dust.
- I don't really have any idea what I'm doing a lot of the time, and I don't really know when I woke up and I was suddenly 25 and a grown up.
- I post pictures of my meals and my runs and my workouts to Instagram so it looks like I have my life together.
- I worry about the future all the live-long day.
- People are often really impressed with my to-do lists and my meal planning and my list of outgoing expenses each month, but the reality is I'm constantly anxious and writing lists and trying to keep on top of things is how I cope.
- I wrote this because I really wanted a blog post with outfit photos but I haven't taken any for weeks and these days I pretty much live in jeans and tshirts and I'm kind of okay with that.
- I want to be more honest on my blog but I'm scared of being so vulnerable.
Sunday, 26 July 2015
Sunday, 19 July 2015
Does this look like the kind of thing someone would wear to an open-air theatre? A few weeks ago Quiz got in touch about creating an outfit for one of a series of summer activities, and after browsing through the list, I thought "open air theatre" sounded interesting - much more me than Marbella Spray Party or Radio 1 weekend in Ibiza. Plus I actually went to the open air theatre once. I was about seven and it was the Merchant of Venice in the park next to my parents' house. I remember my Mum encouraging me to read the play, but when it actually came down to the day all I remember was falling asleep on the grass and waking up covered in ant bites. Anyway.
So while I didn't wear this outfit to actually go to the open air theatre, I thought this would be a perfect outfit. A pretty floral dress - not too dressy but nice enough to not feel under-dressed, flats so your heels don't get stuck in the grass and a jacket to keep you warm just in case it gets a bit chilly in the evening.
dress - c/o Quiz
shoes - c/o Quiz
jacket - Topshop
necklace - Debenhams
lipstick - MAC Girl about Town
While we didn't go to the theatre, we have had a really nice weekend. July has been bizarrely quiet for us, which has been both a blessing and a curse. I feel like it's so hard to get the balance right when it comes to how to spend your weekend. While we rarely do "nothing" on the weekends (and our "nothing" is probably other people's "pretty busy") when we do do "nothing" we often find ourselves getting to Sunday feeling like we have wasted the weekend. But if we have a crazy-busy weekend I feel like I spend the whole time chasing my tail, stressing out about fitting my runs in and worrying about when I'm going to do the washing or clean the flat.
Last weekend was one of the weekends we feel like we wasted. Phil was working away on Friday and didn't get home til 8.30pm, so Friday had disappeared by bedtime. On Saturday we went to parkrun, did the food shopping, went into town and got a coffee and did boring adult shopping in Wilko, and before we knew it it was time for bed. Then on Sunday we did the We Love Manchester 10K (I got another PB - 58:09 - over a minute faster than my last PB of 59:20!) and then went to Phil's parents for a BBQ and to watch Wimbledon. It felt like the whole weekend was over in the blink of an eye, so we were determined to not let that happen this weekend.
Phil's sister has been staying with us this week, which has been really, really lovely, and I wasn't home two of the nights this week so we were feeling like we hadn't had much time together. On Friday we went to a party, and then I went home while Phil and his friends went out and got up early for parkrun on Saturday. Yesterday we both had some work to do, then we went to the cinema to see Ant-Man, did the food shop and then chilled out and watched The Office. We decided yesterday we wanted to go on a day trip today to just feel like we'd "done" something, so I got up early to put on the washing and run 8 miles then we got on the train to Buxton. Buxton is an hour away from us on the train and it's a really nice journey, plus we managed to time it perfectly with their fringe festival and also the summer fete. We bought delicious olives and stone-baked pizzas, sat in the park and just enjoyed the sunshine. It felt like being on holiday! We did get tickets for a tram tour, but when we went to join the group it turned out he'd overbooked so we ended up just going home! It's been so nice to do something on a Sunday instead of just washing and running and food prep.
Enjoy the rest of your Sunday!
Sunday, 5 July 2015
Do you want to know how many times I've been to the cinema this weekend? Three times. Three whole times. At three different cinemas. I also went on Tuesday, which was also to a different cinema. So that's four times this week. That's a lot of sitting in a dark room. Can you tell I'm not exactly loving the hot, humid weather?
Seriously though, it's been great. On Friday Phil and I had date night, which was long overdue. Even though we live together and spend a lot of time together, it's so nice to get dressed up and go out once in a while. Phil was away Monday-Thursday this week because he went to Wimbledon with his Dad, so it was nice for us to get a proper evening to catch up. We went to Superstore which I've wanted to go to for ages. We had the yummiest cocktails (mine had a Maoam with it!) and I had the curried cod, which was huge and absolutely delicious. Then after dinner, we went to Fitzgerald's, which is a 1920s style speakeasy. It was perfect.
Yesterday we went to parkrun, where it was disgustingly hot and humid. I managed a gentle two mile run on Thursday but other than that I hadn't run for almost 2 weeks so I knew it was going to be a bit of a struggle after being ill. Phil said when I finished I looked "a bit green" and he made me sit down for a bit. I did manage to get under 30 minutes (29:59 haha) but I was over 2 minutes over my PB!
Yesterday afternoon we went to Home to see Going Clear, the Scientology film. We tried to go see it on a whim on Thursday night, but as Home is such a small, independent cinema it was already sold out! (We went for a cheeky drink instead!) So yesterday afternoon, we went to see that. Came home, had dinner and then went to another cinema to see Terminator Genisys. Which was... disappointing. I've recently watched the first two Terminator films because they were on Phil's "films I need to have seen by now" list and LOVED them, especially Terminator 2. We went into the film with low expectations though, so we weren't really disappointed!
jeans - Topshop
top - Oasis c/o Clarity
pink jacket - River Island
necklace - Debenhams c/o Think Money
ballet flats - Dorothy Perkins
We have a 10K next weekend, so this morning Phil joined me for 5 slow, very sweaty miles, and then this afternoon we went to see the Amy Winehouse film, which was brilliant but quite upsetting. Tonight I'm planning to read a lot. I've been going to the library on my lunch break almost every day for the past month or so, and as a result I'm getting a lot of books read, which is great. But I'm also reserving a lot of books, and they seem to keep all coming in at once! Last week I read Margaret Atwood's Robber Bride, which I adored, Jonathan Franzen's essays How to be alone, which felt a bit dated, and then Kate Atkinson's Behind the scenes at the museum, which I properly mourned when it was over. I adore Kate Atkinson at the moment and I've just started Life after Life which I cannot put down. I'm so happy to have books back in my life again.
Hope you weekend has been great!