Tuesday, 2 November 2010
Live for today, or live for tomorrow?
Today I am having a stressful day.
I'm sorry for the lack of posting, but I am kind of lacking in a social life at the moment. I only just have enough time to speak to my parents on Skype every two days.
I have so, so much homework to do that it's blowing my mind. Three assignments and a midterm, all next week? Are you serious?
I digress, but I do have a point.
I think it's a strange feeling being a student when your whole life is spend doing things for your future. And it's easy to lose sight of why you're doing something when things get hard.
We are all told to seize the day, live for today.
But what about tomorrow?
What would the consequences be if we all just burnt our diaries, disposed of our schedulues, and lived for the here and now? Would life really be any better? Or would everything just be a mess?
As I've mentioned before, I am fairly obsessive compulsive about planning and organizing.
I decided a year ago almost that I wanted to be a journalist, and every since I have planned and prganized and done anything I could, sent every email I could, to get myself closer to this goal.
Sometimes, when I have articles to write coming out of my ears and a pile of homework to do, I admit, writing can be a chore. I lose sight of why I'm doing it. I lose sight of my goals.
But then I have to pick myself up and think of the future and I get through it.
Like today, if I was to seize the day and live for today, I'd sack off my homework and go do something fun.
But the fact is, I have to do my homework to do well in my courses.
And I have to do well in my courses to do well in my year abroad.
And I have to do well in my year abroad to do well in my degree.
And I have to do well in my degree to get onto my masters' course.
And I have to get onto my masters to achieve my goals of being a journalist.
So my bigger dreams, bigger happiness, is going to be my reward for the hard work that I do now.
I am always focused on the next thing. I am always pushing myself, always working harder.
I may not live for today, but I live for tomorrow. I live for the future.
Maybe there is a happy medium somewhere in between, but I know that I'd rather be satisfied that I am on the way to my goals than waste my precious time on things that won't help my future. I'd rather sacrifice a few nights of fun for time alone with my homework, safe in the knowledge that this will one day make a difference.
I may not be spontaneous, but I'm focused.
And I just hope that every day I don't wake up in the future with regrets.