Things don't always turn out that way.
Things I learnt today- never try to match your outfit to your nails. As you may already know, this skirt is my Remix Item of the Month, which means during the month of September, I have to wear it 3 times. This is my second outfit. It wasn't what I was going to wear today, but I had a distinct case of an outfit LMCIMH. And if you're not acquainted with CSA (Charlotte's Stupid Abbreviations) then that stands for Looking Much Cuter in My Head. This was what I wanted to wear...
The jumper was just a little bit too long and meant I looked as thought I had no waist and generally made me look huge. Le sigh. I'm annoyed I resorted to wearing this skirt with red again but I literally had an outfit meltdown this morning. I'm not crazy about this outfit. It doesn't really excite me. But I knew I wanted to wear this skirt again and I do think it looks awesome against my nails.
I'm kinda a mix of emotions at the moment. One thing you need to know is this girl doesn't like change. Or rather, she resists change. Once change has happened, she usually adapts pretty well, like a chameleon. But faced with change, she panics. Much of this is to do with the fact that I am obsessively organised and I love routine. I don't like change because it not only means getting rid of my own routine, but creating a new routine. Most of the change in my life recently, has been geographical. Moving to America, leaving America, moving back to Stockport and now, facing moving back to Birmingham.
This is the first time I really haven't wanted to move back, which is really strange. I don't know what it is. I think it's just the fact I know it will be different. A lot of my friends won't be there, and the ones who are have jobs now. My job is going to be different. Dancing is going to be different. Balancing my time is going to be harder with my blog and writing commitments and the increased workload that final year inevitably brings. And I'm different. I no longer want to go out twice a week. I don't really drink. I'm much happier staying in and getting on with my work. My room seems so strange and empty. I think it just doesn't feel like my room yet. I guess things don't always turn out how you think they will. I thought I'd be getting ready for my boyfriend to come visit, I thought I'd be decorating my room in pictures of us. But yesterday I posted as my Facebook status, "Life is never really what you think it is, is it?" and someone replied saying "No, but sometimes it's better." And I guess that is something to focus on. I will never, ever know what my life would have been like if things had been different, but maybe this was just what was meant to happen, and maybe life will turn out to be better than I ever imagined.
It's been crazy-windy here today. Fortunately not as bad as I've heard in other places across the country. I considered inside photos but I thought I'd brave it. Unfortunately it wasn't like Marilyn Monroe windy-sexy, more like Postman Pat's Blustery Day. Dragged-through-a-hedge-backwards unsexy. There are some hilarious outtakes I'm contemplating sharing with you.
polka dot skirt- thrifted
red tank top- Topshop
Ignore my face on this picture. I didn't think it would come out.
Well, I am spending my evening reading in sweatpants and a hoodie. I know, I'm wild.
Have a fab evening,